At Last, The Finals

Hello bloggees and bloggettes!

Before beginning, I would like to again mention that we are having, for the next 4 Sundays, July 5th – July 26, a series of Best of the UMC showcases. It’s gonna be great. Click here for details.

And, now, finally, the Winner of the Ultimate Music Challenge is…

Rolling the Stones.

Congratulations you 20-thousand-dollar-having sumbitches!

Spend it wisely, or, go on a bender and blow it all in two days – either way, you earned it!

And just like that, it’s over.

I feel like a kid on Christmas day, after he’s opened all his presents, sitting around the tree looking at all the pieces of gift wrapping, shredded and scattered on the living room floor like, not to mix metaphors, dead soldiers after a great battle.

That’s how it feels for me today, Christmas has come and gone and I never wanted it to end.Before the show started, Alicia kept saying how nervous she was. “Why are you nervous?” I asked, and she said she was nervous “for the bands,” which I didn’t understand, until a few minutes before Don’t Stop Believing (DSB) came on and then I got nervous too, for the bands, and understood completely what she meant.

I was also nervous for myself because I knew it would be a hard night of judging and didn’t want to make any mistakes. 32 thousand dollars was on the line and I prayed it would be disbursed correctly, which, without the slightest doubt, I believe it was.

Don't Stop Believing

Rolling the Stones deserved that win. The judges (and the crowd) agreed. RTS was the clear winner, with Monsters of Rock in second, clearly, and the last two – Siren’s Crush and Don’t Stop Believing neck and neck for 3^rd and 4^th. The last two spots were the hardest to decide.

Here’s the funny thing.

Before going to the show, my wife, some friends and I had dinner at D.Z. Akins. During the meal, we had a discussion about whom we thought would win and the consensus was, DSB and Siren’s Crush would fight over the first and second slots and RTS and MOR– based on their weaker Semi-finals performances – would battle over the last two positions.

I agreed with them but also added that I would not be surprised if RTS and MOR stepped it up because there was no way either of those bands was going to allow themselves to perform poorly – and when I say poorly, I mean relatively poorly – two weeks in a row.

DSB rocks!

From the moment “Mick” came bounding onto that stage, until their full-band, theater-bow at the end, it was pure rock and roll delight. I told “Mick” after the show, “I will never tire of that moment when you come out onto the stage for the first time and throw your hands in the air to the cheers of the audience – it is such a Jagger moment, and you have it nailed.”

The set list was to die for. They opened with “Brown Sugar,” which was a great, set-launching choice, followed by the spine tingling “Gimme Shelter” (featuring Sherr’s oh so magical co-vocals), then “Can’t You Hear Me Knocking,” with that awesome percussion jam at the end, and “Keith” nailing Keith’s guitar parts on tone, style and spacing. That was the shit! Or so I thought, until they started playing “Sympathy for the Devil,” and realized that was the shit and the previous shit was just a bit of flatulence in comparison.

What a chill-spilling performance, what with Mick gliding back and forth on the stage while the girls sang “ooh-ooh” over and over again, and sounding more like a wind instrument (flute perhaps?) than vocals, and “Keith” again, nailing that gorgeous “Sympathy” slop-solo that just spills out of the PA like an upturned bottle of KickAss.

Jumping Jack Flash was an excellent choice for the finale. It’s a song everybody knows, but hasn’t been stripped of its soul the way “Satisfaction” has been. “Jumping Jack Flash” is the kind of tune that carries itself and all RTS had to do was show it the way home, which they most certainly did.

In short, an astounding set, astounding songs. My only complaint, and it’s a minor one, was repeating the Charlie Swatts’ “Hello” gag. It was funny the first time, pointless the second.

Monsters of Rock praying to the Metal Gods

MOR was a five-man wrecking crew. I thought their song selection was weak-ish in the semis, but last night’s repertoire was exactly what it needed to be. They started with the heavy metal classic, Deep Purple’s “Highway Star,” which, by the way, was the first song MOR  played at their very first Ultimate Music Challenge appearance, last year, during UMC2.

It was, for me, a top-ten UMC memory. I remember when they started playing it, my first thought was, “There is no way they are gonna do this masterpiece any justice. There is no way those guitar players – who both look like they teach Nerd Workshops in their spare time – are going to pull of the shredding stylings of Ritchie Blackmore. There is no way this singer, who looks like a cross between a post-pubescent Opie Griffith and Dennis the Menace – was going to pull off Ian Gillian.”

But pull it off they did, and I rose from my seat when Ron nailed that signature Gillian shriek and I’ve been standing for MOR ever since.

After revisiting “Highway Star,” Monsters did not look back. They chased it with the Cult’s, “Love Removal Machine,” followed by Judas Priest’s angry, anthemic, “You’ve Got Another Thing Coming,”  the Who’s “The Real Me,” Queensryche’s “Queen of the Ryche,” and finally, Iron Maiden’s “The Trooper,” during which came the theatrical highlight of the night, and one of the top five memorable moments of the UMC – the beheading of Dave Patrone.

That was too funny. Dave himself didn’t realize whom they were executing right away, but when he did – well, he was a good sport about it. Props to Monsters for bringing something new and interesting to the game. Nice touch, also, with the balloons (balloons always makes metal music better), and Eddie the zombie mascot (of whom I never tire) and some extra random creepies, including the executioner, Bruce (a.k.a. Alice), who was kind enough to let MOR use his guillotine (heavy metal always sounds better when there’s a beheading involved) and basically closed their set – and the night – with a thunderous bang.

MOR supports the troops via Iron Maiden

It was so great; hard to find something to criticize. If I had to pinpoint a reason that MOR lost to RTS, I would say, it came down to – yes, I’m going to use the word – dynamics. In this case, dynamics as it applies to tempo. Rolling the Stones won the tempo dynamics game by bringing us up and down and all over the place, whereas MOR pretty much kept us up, up and more up. Of course, they do “up” so well, so gracefully, that it’s not totally a bad thing, but when you lay the two performances side by side, it was tempodynamics that made the difference.

Siren’s Crush was spectacular as well. I absolutely love this band. Sadly, it was the weakest of their three performances, for two reasons. The first song (which I did not know) stayed in its pocket, which is a problem, especially for an intro, which, you know, really needs to jump out at you.

contraposto siren's - like greek statues

After that, they did “Piece of My Heart”, which some think was a bad choice. I disagree. I thought they knocked the original version into the dirt, kicked its ass repeatedly, then propped its lifeless body and did a tribal slamdance around it. I’m saying it was awesome.

The Alicia Keys song was brung as well. And while I know many did not appreciate, what I call, “The Costume Change Jam,” I, for one, loved it. It was straight-up funkalicous. Nevermind the talkboxing, which, no matter how you slice talkboxes, are tres cool. And I loved how he paid homage to Peter Frampton’s infamous Talkbox solo  (“Do you feel, like we do?”) before going into “California.”

Others were not as impressed. At one point, Alicia asked if maybe the jam was going on too long (an opinion held by many). “Not if it ends right now,” I responded and, as if on cue, it ended right then. It was perfect. It showcased the boys for once, without peer through a giant wall of estrogen.

When the girls returned to the stage – in new costumes – and started rocking out to Evanesence; well, that was theatrically dynamic! Only one problem. . .  “Wake Me Up Inside” was sloppy; probably, their sloppiest song of all three performances.

Finally they played “Free your Mind” and killed it; I mean really killed it. The harmonies couldn’t have been more juicy. I was pleased that they had  rebounded so well. Still, rebounding was not good enough. There is no room for mistakes in the finals. There’s just too much talent running around that even the tiniest blunders are magnified. It’s like a game between two chess masters. They are both excellent and it rarely comes down to who is the better player, rather, who makes the first mistake.

That said, let’s keep these mistakes in perspective. Mistakes may be magnified on finals night, but in the real world, at a regular gig, nobody would’ve batted an eye at “Wake Me Up,” because Siren’s are magnificent in so many ways.

Ditto DSB. They are a fabulous band. And I really thought, coming in, that they were going to take first or second place. And the reason they took last place was “Highway to Hell.”

Now, I am not of the opinion that it was wrong for a Journey tribute band to play AC/DC. I had no problem with that whatsoever. In fact, when the first guitar part kicked in, I howled with appreciation. Yes, it was a risk, but I appreciate the risk takers of the world. I appreciated that they were trying to mix it up, trying to poke their heads out of the box for a moment. I get that. I’m down. Kudos for trying.

No, the problem was not song choice, rather, the execution of the song. And it all came down to vocals. The bass player’s falsettos just seemed false, forced. When compared to the fluid, graceful falsettos of singer Juan, the AC/DC vocals stood out like a sore thumb. And the first chorus harmonies were way off. The second chorus was better, and the second half lead vocals improved, but by then the song was lost and the set mortally wounded.

Another issue with DSB was song selection. With the exception of “Oh Sherrie,” (awesome rendition by the way) and “Highway to Hell,” they repeated 4 songs. This was a mistake, especially considering the size of Journey’s catalog. Repeating that many songs risked boring the judges, or, at least, removing the element of surprise. Maybe that’s what the AC/DC was for. Still, the repeats didn’t help their cause.

That said, they were, and are, an awesomely talented band. Juan has an unbelievable voice. And the drummer? Jesus he was good. Come to think of it, all the drummers last night were spankin’. It truly was The Night of the Drummers. I bow to thee all.

Anyway, what a night. My only regret is that it’s over. These bands are all so good.

I won’t say anything hokey like, “You were all winners last night,” but I will say that you four are in the top of your class, and that each of you are going to earn a lot of money, fans and friends just by going out there and doing what you do; so keep doing it, purty please.

I would also like to add how impressed I am with the sound and light crew; the job you did last night, and throughout, makes the DreamCatcher one of the best live venues in the county. I currently don’t know of any that tops it.

To the bar staff and security – much love for you guys. I know how hard it is to do what you do, and I know you all busted your asses last night. I’m sure I’ll be seeing you soon.

To JackFM, the MC’s and other staff. Well done getting the word out! Keep up the good work!

To Casey, Tony, and the rest of Viejas management, and the kumeyaay tribe. Thank you for having me on board for this event. It’s really something and I am privileged and proud to be a part of it.

To the other judges, Alicia and Dave. It was inspirational working with you. I have learned so much from your musical expertise and powers of observation. You are savants in my opinion, and it’s an honor to have sat by your side.

Thanks also, to the audience, who made this event possible. Thanks for your cheers and your jeers. Thanks to all the new friends I’ve made, and old friends who came down. Thanks even to the young lady who gave me the finger when I was on stage last night, yeah, even you lady, thanks, because people like you – the sourpusses and negative Nellies of UMC – you make me laugh with your tantrums and your crybaby faces. Please don’t ever stop.

And last but not least, to the bloggers. Thanks for coming in here. Thanks for posting your opinions and encouraging debate. It has been a blast. No reason to stop either. Keep ‘em coming people. You know I love you.

The King has spoken.

Edwin Decker
Judge #3

~ by edwin decker on June 29, 2009.